Who needs bravehearts?

Fortune does not always favour the brave. Margaret Alva must be ruing the fact that it was she who has had to bring up the subject about sons and grandsons and not CK Jaffer Sharief himself. One reason could be the fact that it was Sharief, and not she, who has been sought to be placated by the party. The former railways minister has apparently been offered the post of ambassador to Saudi Arabia, which, the party feels, would stop him from hobnobbing with Mayavati, and even shore up its image in the Middle East. No such luck for Alva. She would now not only find it difficult to stay on in the party, but might have her transit routes blocked as well. Take her possible switchover to the Nationalist Congress Party. Some say that the NCP is an unlikely destination for her, especially since she doesn’t seem to have made Vilasrao Deshmukh too happy as the AICC gen-sec looking after Maharashtra. NCP leaders insist that given Deshmukh’s equation with Sharad Pawar, he could keep Alva perpetually out. But then, Alva might not be trying too hard either. There is always the choice of floating one’s own party to keep oneself afloat. And if Alva manages to become a heavyweight like Mamata Banerjee, she might even get to sink her detractors’ boats.

New game

Remember Chetan Sharma, more famous for being hit for a six in the last ball by Javed Miandad during the nail-biting finish at Sharjah than getting the first hattrick in the World Cup? Now there is more reason for instant recall. The pacer is set to make his political debut from a Lok Sabha seat in Faridabad. He owes his new career to Maya memsaab, who wants him to slog it out for a win. The BSPwallah says he has always been a fighter and his grassroots links will see him to victory. Hopefully, there will be no Miandad to spoil his show this time.

A leisurely stroll

Few in India will say they derive pleasure from taking a walk in a busy thoroughfare in Agra. But not Bill Gates. The former Microsoft chief was on his way back to the hotel with his father, wife and kids after visiting the Taj when his cavalcade got caught in a traffic snarl. The clock ticked away, and after a while, Gates lost patience and began walking. His security personnel followed dutifully. But they needn’t have bothered. The people of Agra, used to firangs, did not give him a second look, allowing Gates some precious freedom of movement. Little wonder Gates so enjoyed his visit to Agra.

Working overtime

Politicians have the odd knack of making lives miserable. Take TR Baalu, the Union minister for shipping and road transport, who is said to be singularly responsible for the National Highways Authority having had five chairmen in a matter of a few months. Baalu apparently likes making his babus wait. He thinks nothing of making them stay back after office hours on the few days of the month that he decides to attend office. The junior staff feel nothing about it, since they get to collect a fatter pay cheque for overtime, but senior officials have not stopped complaining since Baalu took over.

Medication required

If you happen to visit a chemist’s shop in the capital and ask for a 10 to 15 per cent discount, chances are you will not be refused. In a peculiar development, more and more chemists in the city do not mind losing up to 20 per cent of the printed maximum retail price of drugs in order to beat the increasing competition. The trend has gone unnoticed by the health ministry, which is too busy living up to the exacting standards of its minister’s ‘no-smoking’ campaign. It has also missed the fact that almost all chemist shops in the country are run by people without the necessary qualifications, although a full-time qualified pharmacist is the first requirement that a shop needs in order to be eligible for a trade licence.

Parivar planning

The Vishwa Hindu Parishad has presented the BJP’s prime-minister-in-waiting, LK Advani, with a new demand. If the NDA comes to power, the VHP wants it to abandon the “hum do, hamare do” family planning programme. In the election-bound states and in Uttar Pradesh, a VHP booklet, titled Bharat mein Hindu bahumat, has urged the members of the majority community to produce four offspring — two for the family, and two for the country. Family planning, the booklet insists, is proving detrimental to the “Hindu cause” and will produce a lopsided demographic profile by 2100 that will go against the “national interest”. Any buyers?

Footnote
Eggs are meant for cakes

It is not unusual for politicos to believe some places are jinxed forever for them. Uma Bharti feels that way about Chhindwara, where she kicked off her election campaign in 2003 by cutting a cake to mark Hanuman’s birthday. While she insisted it was not a ‘Western’ cake, but the very desi barfi, her opponent, Digvijay Singh, said it had eggs in it. It was in Chhindwara again that she could not resist slapping a party faithful and some cheeky lensmen this year. Diggy Raja faces the same problem with Chhattisgarh. In 2000, when he went to the place to witness Ajit Jogi take over as CM, a section of the state’s Congressmen hostile to him grounded him with blows and punches. This year, Digvijay went to Chhattisgarh again to bail out Jogi and misfortune lay in wait, again. At a public meeting in Rajim, eggs were thrown at him. But thank god for small mercies, the eggs caked the microphone, not his face.